The FAT Project is over. The FAT Project has failed.

This is a ten-minute video so I thought a brief summary would help.

I am ending the Food Addict to Triathlete Project because it has failed in its goals.

I am so grateful to everyone who helped with their time, energy and money. And hopefully this has helped people in some way. I am delighted by how many amazing new connections and relationships I have made.

I have not failed. I am fitter, healthier and stronger than I have ever been. I will still be doing an Olympic Triathlon next year but just for me. (I would be honoured as a friend if you want to join). I have learned so much, done so much because of the FAT Project and my only regret is that it didn’t work.

I still need to learn more self-love instead of self loathe. If you know me, you know I love being out in public and putting on a show. I am going to continue that in some fashion. (calling it www.iwillbeme.ca)

Thanks for the energy, the well wishes, the support of me and the FAT Project. I am in awe of that and eternally grateful.

Going forward:

1. Eat how I want to eat for the rest of my life.  Not a ‘diet’, and all the baggage that comes with that. This enable me to lose the 100 lbs and then 30 year old habits asserted themselves and this became a diet that I cheated on a lot.  Every day is a new day.
2. Be active everyday, especially with my 5 daughters. I am quite possibly in the best shape I have been as an adult.  I did a Try-A-Tri, and 82 km of a 100 km ride. I still have a very long way to go……
   

   Celebrating completing 82 km in 6.5 hrs on a cold and windy day in September

3. Be honest with myself and publicly about my eating, my emotional state.  I am good at lying to myself about my actions and emotions to the point that sometimes I really don’t know how I am feeling.

The article below helped me get to a better place and the courage to end the FAT Project as a failure.

I had called EFAP two weeks ago, to try to get out of a bad place with using food to cope with life.  I have been struggling with emotions lately and not been dealing with it effectively.  Thankfully I was able to see a counsellor today and we connected.  You don’t always connect with a someone in this capacity so I am delighted to say I got lucky.

We had a good conversation for an hour around everything going on in my life and how I am using food to handle it.  She and I determined a few goals (see below) that I am committing to for the next two weeks. What I like about this process is I am enabling someone external to enter my life for the specific purpose of improving my well being.  There are a lot of things I do well, but self care has not being one of them!

Goals before the next appointment on July 5, 2018:

1. Photograph everything I eat and post to the Fat Project’s Instagram (Yes all of it – even the poor choices). This will help me eat better so you may not see anything too poor – I really need a name for this beyond the Observer Effect.
2. I will walk from Union Station to my office at 250 Yonge St. twice a week for the next two weeks.  We didn’t specify whether this was both ways 🙂  But I will assume the positive intention and assume it is both ways.
3. Prepare a list of coping skills instead of eating that I have used successfully. (This will be the hardest and I am not yet sure where to start).

Sushi at my desk with miso #thefatproject #keepingitreal #postallmyfood

A post shared by Paul McIntyre Royston (@thefatproject) on Jun 25, 2018 at 1:03pm PDT

Smoothie and coffee from my new office at 250 Yonge St. in Toronto #grateful #opportunity #thefatproject

A post shared by Paul McIntyre Royston (@thefatproject) on Jun 25, 2018 at 6:02am PDT

I have been a hot mess as far as consistency goes with the FAT Project since I found out we were pregnant with twins almost two years ago.  I’ve had great streaks in both great choices and terrible choices.

This continues almost daily as I struggle with binge eating coupled with measuredd portions and focused exercise.  They don’t go well together.  I really need a more level approach.

If you know me well you know that I set things high and then meander and stretch my way towards this bold goal and bring others along with me.  The problem is while that has worked in my career, it is NOT working now.   I cannot continue the FAT Project with just the Olympic distance triathlon as the target.

I must take the small steps each day to move toward what I want.

1. Daily Walk – I don’t care how long
2. Biking Goal – my wife and I are coming to an agreement about me earning a road bike this year. How much I have to ride etc..?
3. Get a coach – I have avoided this out of fear and ego.  I have one for leadership, I NEED one for the FAT Project.  Ideas? Interested?  This isn’t a sport coach yet. (That comes when I can actually properly do a triathlon)
4. 5 Seconds – Before I eat anything at all….I must take stock for 5 seconds about what I am doing.
5. Name my obesity.  I follow the Canadian Medical Association approved definition of Obesity which frames it as a disease.  It isn’t my fault but it is my responsiblility.  I have read that cancer patients often name their tumor.  So I will too…….and I want your help to pick!
   • Zorkon the Destroyer
   • Kepler
   • Jimmy
   • Slartibartfast
   • Other ideas ( no Boaty McBoatface!)